Aight, well today is historical. And thanks to a missing patella tendon, I can't leave the couch. So I'm writing this running diary instead of talking the ears off of everyone around, as I would be doing if I were off my couch.
11:25 AM: Just got done talking to Taj. Not because I only will talk to black people on the day of Obama's inauguration, but because I owed him a call. I had the TV on mute, where I watched the VIPs walking the red carpet .. The Carters, The Clintons, Aretha Franklin ... wtf? Not sure what she has to do with this, other than being black and singing about RESPECT. They just announced the former first wives - Lynne Cheney and Laura Bush. God, how good to see them go away forever. Not them, but the people the decided to marry. Maybe they see something in their husbands that America doesn't ... But probably not. Alright, waiting for them to announce Melia and Sasha Obama. Little black kids walking down the VIP carpet. Things have definitely changed. The crowd is chanting for Obama.
11:30 PM: There's a shit ton of people. Something ceremonial like this has never interested me in any way. But I'm somewhat bummed I am not there. Instead, all I have is this shitty running diary. WTF? Dick Cheney is in a wheelchair? They just wheeled him into a side room when they saw the cameras. I KNEW it! He's dying or something. That's why he is such a bitter asshole. He's like that bitter old neighbor of yours that is pissed off he's old and you're not. I love how the CNN commentators said nothing about the wheelchair. LIke we didn't all just see that. Oh wait, they are explaining it now. Saying he "tweaked his back" moving boxes in his house and doctor's advised him to stay off his feet. Yeah right. That's plausible. Stay off your feet for the inauguration. It is always these weak, frail people who cause such trouble with violence. They can't do shit with their own bodies, so instead they order armies around. Look no further than Napoleon, Hitler, Cheney.
11:37 PM: I don't think anyone even cheered for Bush. LIke out of the 2 million people there, not one person clapped. Has any President ever been so hated? Make no mistake, Obama is cool. But he looks that much cooler walking out right after the worst President of all time. If he was following, FDR, say, he might not look as cool. Aight, Obama is about to come out. The last eight years of ignorance and stupidity are almost over. Amazing, just like that. Stupidity, and everything associated with it, instantly replaced with intelligence. Unfortunately, CNN has totally filtered out the cheers of the crowd, so all I can hear is the useless musings of Wolf Blitzer. Thanks for that.
11:43 AM: There he is. Anti-climatic. CNN still insists on filtering out crowd noises, and they preceeded his entry with Nancy Pelosi. Talk about a buzz kill. But there he is. A black dude. Old white guys everywhere just puked in their mouth a little bit.
11:52 AM: Rick Warren, praying to God, in the same tone he'd use to describe the transmission of his 98 Honda Accord.
11:58 AM: Does Yo-Yo Ma get every good cello gig in the world? If I were another celloist, I'd be pretty pissed. Do other celloists even exist?
2:55 PM: Well, the running journal took a hit with the arrival of Age and Amanda (thanks for the McDonalds). So I decided to talk their ear off rather than write. Obama's speech seemed good, not great, but he's great, so who cares what his speech was. I'm ready to be in a good mood for the next eight years.