Before our recent mancation up to Portland, Maine, when, during the normal course of conversation, the party in question would learn of our intended destination, I commonly heard the following comment:
"Why the hell would you want to go there? It sucks."
Further inquiry into the source of the comment would reveal one of two things: Either the person making that comment had never actually been to Portland, Maine, but held that opinion nonetheless, or had gone to Portland, Maine with their family when 3-years-old, and they remember a high level of suckiness.
This is to mention nothing of the fact that only a self-interested cock-knocker would deliberately denigrate the intended destination of your vacation. Jill recently informed me a co-worker responded, upon learning Jill was headed to St. Marteen for a wedding, "That place is soooo ghetto!"
Now, I'm as opinionated a person as you've ever met. I have opinions on everything, things as general as saltwater to things as specific as the fourth meteor of the leonid meteor showers. But even I know there is a time to share this opinion, and a time to not share this opinion. And when someone has already booked a ticket to a vacation destination, that is not the time to piss all over that said destination.
This issue also proves my long-held belief that human beings are in a constant, never-ending fight for the spotlight. No human being can safely sit back and just accept that I am going to Portland, Maine without sharing an opinion that puts the attention back on them. By stating their opinion on Portland, Maine, they are implying that they are 1) well-travelled, at least more so than me, as I have never been to Portland, Maine 2) high-class, as the reason for not liking Portland, Maine is due to a dearth of 5-star hotels and world-class status 3) a total, selfish asshole
As for the people who make that statement, even though they had never even been to Portland, Maine, I ask you: Does Atlantis suck too? And Hades? And a restaurant in 19th Century Indochina? And all the other places you've never been? Or did you see a movie once that gave you an opinion of Portland, Maine? Or a show on TV?
And if you went to Portland, Maine when you were three-years-old, please keep your mouth shut. Going anywhere before the age of fourteen doesn't count. Cause even if you remember it, you were with your parents the whole time doing gay family-vacation type shit that nobody is interested in.
For the record, Portland, Maine was a cool-ass city. Kind of like Seattle without all the self-indulgent Starbuck-drinking techies. Feel free to share this opinion in the future. And if you happen to be headed to the fourth meteor of the leonid meteor trail, save the trip. It sucks.