misAdventures of Workmonkey 3.0

(workmonkey's entry)

Each morning for the past month, I've walked through the thin glass doors that serve as the back entrance to my office and sat down at my desk. I've kept a fairly consistent arrival time of between 10:30 A.M. and 10:37 A.M. And each morning, without fail, I've exchanged the identical pleasantries with the freelancer who is seated to the left of my open-air desk. The exchange, to a letter, is as follows:

Me: "Good Morning."

Him: "How are you?"

Me: "Good. good."

And that concludes the extent of our interchange. During the day, no other words are spoken, no other attempts at peeling beneath the layer of superficial exchanges are made. It serves him fine, and serves me fine. I've gotten over that sentiment I had when I was an idealist pimple-face, that no conversation is worth having unless it is genuine. I've grown to accept, and even cherish, the monotonous conversations that bring us through an average day. I have no desire to bring my relationship with this freelancer past our morning greeting, and I'm quite sure he doesn't either. So we have a fine arrangement. I can prove I am a friendly person with my very sincere rendition of "Good Morning." He can prove he isn't a self-absorbed dickmunch by asking "How are You?" However, this is where things take an unexpected turn. At what point did I start answering questions with a double answer? Every single time, unconsciously, I answer "Good" then pause a second, and repeat, "good". So there are two "goods" in there. And I don't change it. It has almost become an essential part of my morning. Almost as if I change the double answer, something horrific will happen that day. But I simply cannot recall any other time in my life I used the double-answer technique. None of my friends use it, so I know I didn't pick it up there. I didn't get it from a movie. I remember about five years ago there was a McDonald's commercial with some guy who always said things twice (which made him a natural when he ordered the double-double cheeseburger for 99 cents). But they made fun of that guy, and it was five years ago, so why would I use that as a source? It is sufficient to say that my double-good ends the conversation on queue, each morning. I imagine there is no real response to a double-good, as it usually leaves him wondering if he asked two questions, which is why I provided two answers. Maybe he questions whether or not, unknowingly, he has asked me both "How are You" and "Did you see Saw III? How was it?", which might be the only reason for me replying "Good. good". One of these days, I might have to throw him for a loop and try a triple-good. That just might throw him into a total chaotic spiral into madness. madness. madness.