I'm experiencing excrutiating writer's block. But I am writing anyway. I am sitting down with my notebook each evening and writing crap for my work in progress. I'm using way too many adverbs, nonsense action sequences and little description. I'm going outside of character -- making my main gal do and say things she'd never do and say. I am doing this because I have to write in spite of the block.
I'm doing the equivalent of busting through a road block. I'm tapping against the blockade right now and chipping the concrete, soon I hope to rev up the car, get it to 100mph and knock that crap down.
This is hard for me. I've heard it said that I'm a perfectionist -- which I find amusing. I've never thought of myself this way before, and I'm sure neither have my teachers, employers or parents. (Look, I just used "neither" wrong). And I don't care. I certainly wasn't (and currently am not) a perfectionist in my studies, work or house cleaning. But I suppose there's some truth in that I need to be perfect in my writing.
Not that I am -- see, I never will be. But I haven't wanted to proceed unless I could be perfect in my writing. So that screws up the whole learn as you go process. I don't want to learn by mistake. I want to be breathtakingly proseful right out of the gate.
Lately, I've realized it's not going to happen that way. There are revisions, there are full-on rewrites, there are scrapping the whole thing and starting overs. It's not going to be perfect. Ever. So, I've got to write anyway.
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