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I went to Vegas for a business trip. It was long. My feet hurt. I got sick. People made me mad. Other people walked in on me while I was showering. This bothered me. I have a large belly that looks even larger in flourescent light.
Kev met me in Vegas after business trip. We stayed at the Luxor one night (I really liked it...plus, it was the first continuous night sleep I've had in over 5 years). We saw the Blue Man Group. They were OK. The tickets were expensive ($187 for two). The whole thing seemed like performance art to me, like the kind you see in a community church in the barrio. A little clunky and awkward and amateur...Kev liked it though. I did too, mostly, but did not think it was worth nearly $200 to see.
The next day: a buffet. Good.
Stayed at Bourbon Street Friday night. Please do not ever stay at this hotel. Bed bugs. Dust. General mildew. Empty casino with jukebox playing "Come Monday." Blackjack tables folded up and abandoned in corners. Marquees proclaiming the 7PM show of "Hypnolarious," starring Deogee, the Hypno Pup. What does Deogee mean? Do you know? Is Deogee an ancient Greek god of making people sing like Britney Spears while their mind is controlled by a stuffed canine?
Saturday: buffet. Pretty Good.
Drove to Williams, AZ, where we were to stay for a few days. Starting point for the train ride to the Grand Canyon on Sunday...
Dinner: buffet. OK.
Breakfast: buffet. So-so.
Go to Grand Canyon, but before we see it, we are whisked to a lunch at the Maswik Lodge, which was part of our "Rails to the Rim" package.
Lunch: buffet. Please make it stop.
Grand Canyon: spectacularious. Truly impressive. And Kev and I? We don't impress easy.
Soon, we are heading back to Williams. We forgo the buffet and wait two hours in the bar for banal food.
Breakfast on Monday? Buffet. However, I decide to get an entree after a large coarse black hair winks at me from my scrambled eggs AND after I witness a child pick their nose, then move on to finger the community waffles.
PM Monday: Sedona. Lovely Red Rock wondrousness. I feel I could stay forever! We do a vortex tour. It is the 6th anniversary of my mom's passing away. She would have loved the vortex tour. We go to Cathedral Rock and visit a sacred area by the creek. Tons of gravity-defying human-made rock sculptures on the creek bed. I build one for my mama. We take pictures. I'll post one.
The next day: we grow tired on Sedona. But it took us until 1PM to admit this to each other. This is when we decide to leave. Kevin maps out some freaked-out, circuitous route that takes us away, rather than toward our destination of Laughlin, Nev.
We traverse thin, snowswept (almost), Everest-like slopes while traveling through old mining towns and cliff-hung communities. I whiten my knuckles and continously pee my pants a little with each hairpin turn.
It takes us nearly seven hours to get to Laughlin. It would have been three via a direct-route. That's all I'm saying.
We pay $25 for a hotel room and I fall asleep. Kev goes to gamble (he loves those adrenalin-pumped off-road adventures) and comes back to the hotel 2.5 hours later with a family-size Lunchables and BBQ pringles. I remind myself that I love this man, then try to fall back asleep.
Next morning: buffet. At this point, I'd sooner eat the Lunchables salami rinds from the evening before.
Now, we are to head home.
Kev draws a route through backward desert towns because the "freeway takes too long."
All right. It is raining like nutso-crazy and we are in the middle of nowhere's ville. I imagine in-breds blocking the road and dragging us off to some desert shack for the Hills-Have-Eyes type action.
The road is flooded out in several areas and we go about 40 mph for hours...but get home in one piece.
I bet you can't wait for the pictures!
And to be quite truthful: I had a very nice time. But for narrative sake, I had to play up the drama.
