Debbie Does Drivel

Such is my life today:

1. Wake up. Do not shower. Pull on sweats and ratty tennis shoes.
2. Drive to McDonald's. Purchase a griddle cake breakfast sandwich.
3. Plan lunch.
4. Make a grilled cheese sandwich, eat fistfuls of Fritos straight out the bag.
5. Spray whip cream directly into mouth.
6. Do not change out of food-stain-riddled sweats.
7. Prepare dinner by pulling burger and fry combo out of greasy bag and placing on paper plate.
8. Retrieve calculator from "work-box" and add up calories consumed during day.
9. Call husband and start to cry inexplicably.
10. At husband's prodding, use calculator to determine days left until period.
11. Sheepishly hang up phone.
12. Give in to hormonal onslaught and brainstorm new Cold Stone Creamery ice cream combinations.

Just living la vida loca.